The last time my husband made me steak, it was overly done. He should know by now how I like my meat: Tenderized and on the rare to blue rare side. Hubby is naked on the kitchen island with arm restrains. I decide to demonstrate how to prepare meat: On his ass. While talking about the use of kitchen implements, I brutally paddle and cane his ass. I remind him that to properly prepare steak, juices must come to the surface before adding oil and salt. Things get messy, but this is is how you keep a marriage strong. Once his skin is broken and red, I rub oil and and salt on his wounds before adding the final spicy ingredient: Ghost pepper sauce. One of my favorite corporal clips to date.